明末清初的动荡时期，丰润县马蹄庄庄主高保良把不顾百姓死活一心敛财的知县魏怀远的女儿魏文贞绑至磨坊，想借此让魏怀远免收村民钱粮。因不敌入侵的清兵而阵亡的边关元帅卢象升的侄儿卢方（王羽）因突围一事途经马蹄庄，见此情形决意插手…

程胜（周星驰饰）乃一游手好闲之徒，终日坑蒙拐骗，无恶不作。一日装瞎子行骗，遇遇女骗子（毛舜筠饰）被追债的贵利工打手排骨（元华饰）欺负，胜一时看不过眼出手相救，不料却被债务转嫁弄了自己一屁股债。另一方面。老江湖凌万蜂（午马…

“Sophie is good at school and Mum's thrilled. Jessica has her boyfriend and, anyway, she’s Jessica. Me? I dunno. A void. I suck.”　　They’re all nuts. Her parents, wh…